This week I am writing to the people feeling over-whelmed and worried in the current climate. These feelings may be familiar or shockingly new.
Something that feels a lot like Despair or low mood, visiting you fleetingly or stuck like gum & hard to change. Are you re-thinking worrying thoughts, worst case scenario's & attempting to predict the future, only to feel increasingly lost?
Your tetchier when communicating with others or find yourself withdrawing from conversations. Struggling to complete tasks or focus on even starting them.
This blog will look at some ways that you can move through despair for yourself.
The origins of the word "Despair" from the Oxford English dictionary derives from being "down from" "hope"
"Middle English: the noun via Anglo-Norman French from Old French desespeir; the verb from Old French desperer, from Latin desperare, from de-‘down from’ +sperare‘ to hope’." ( Oxford English Dictionary)
Another way to consider Despair is thinking about De-Pairing or Dis-Pairing.... the un-pairing of where you are and where you want to be.
Recent events have been "de-railing". You are off course. And, in the midst of the confusion become down from hope.
Right now you are learning to re-navigate your course, Unexpectedly going from A (where you were) to B (where you thought you were heading). Finding yourself on un-familiar routes.
You are in the zone of still figuring things out, and despair can leave you feeling powerless & out of control.
Psychologists such as Beck propose that it is easy for us to get stuck in this loss of power & confusion.
Experiencing a sense of Helplessness, Hopelessness & Worthlessness.
Helplessness - A sense that there are no solutions to change the situation. Fearful to reach out & ask for help.
Hopelessness- In the midst of despair, the situation becomes sucked of opportunity & your struggle to consider solutions, resolve problems & see optimism.
Worthlessness - Hesitant to seek support thinking you will be a burden to others in this situation. Stuck in a sense of despair believing you don't deserve to feel any other way & perhaps that this situation is even fate or Karma?
Despair can deceive & distort our perceptions.
The good news is, this feeling of despair can & will shift. Starting with small actions to reap huge benefits.
Here are some Tips to help you help change feelings of despair and over-whelm.
·Move - star jumps, shimmy, dance or walk. This will also help to create a positive boost of fabulous hormones in your brain.
Write a list (in your head or on paper) of 5 ways you can be kinder to yourself right now.
Find something or someone that makes you laugh, a film, a joke, your face in the mirror!
Share concerns and generate ideas with a trusted person who is a good listener. Discover creative solutions together.
Bring yourself to the present. 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can feel, 2 things you can smell, 1 thing you can taste.
Find positive actions & feelings you can do: I feel positive after an hours sunshine"...."prepping a meal for the family makes me purposeful" ..." I am doing my best & that's the kindest thing I can do right now"
Complete the Reflections Sheet below to help you discover your place of Worth, Hope, Help and Action.