Therapeutic Coaching is really helpful if you find yourself stuck in a rut of feeling “not good enough” or frightened that you are totally “blagging it” in work or life and in constant fear that you are going to get caught out.

 

This experience is also best described as Imposter Syndrome (I.S) I specialize in coaching people to be free of the emotional burden and mindset restrictions claimed by your imposter narrative.  Helping you understand and retrain your beliefs, around I.S , so you can change your behaviours and reclaim inner-confidence, clarity and calm in your life. 

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Although historical research typically alluded to Imposter Syndrome being a phenomenon that affected women. Modern research shows that I.S can affect anyone, no matter which gender you identify with. If this is you, you may feel unable to discuss your beliefs with your peers or family for fear of sounding silly or being misunderstood.

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Imposter Syndrome is also something that clients from diverse backgrounds often identify with. Although we have made much progress in diversity and mental health stigmatization, you may find imposter syndrome beliefs are founded by personal experiences of stigmatisation, bullying or segregation that may have occurred in your life or where you have experienced a significant traumatic event.

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What is Imposter Syndrome? The term imposter syndrome (IS) describes a belief system that increases self-doubt and makes you feel in adequate or unsuccessful.

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The likelihood is that you have a decent career, and your life is seemingly in place” to the outside world. But your inner experience is clouded by uncertainty and disbelief in your abilities or worth.  I.S can also increase chances of Stress, Anxiety or Low Mood. 

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If you relate to the Imposter Syndrome narrative you will be giving yourself a hard time and worry about being a complete fraud at what you do., on constant look out for the person who is going to call you out!

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To others you might be perceived as confident or progressive in work and life. But internally, you tell yourself a whole different story, dissatisfied and uneasy at who you are, or what you feel you aren’t achieving.  

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Currently you might be using one or more of the following “strategies” common to people experiencing imposter syndrome:

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• Avoidance: staying out of situation in which you worry you might fail or embarrass yourself.

• Hiding:  standing back from opportunities

• Procrastinating: leaving things to the last minute and then rushing/panicking to get things done.

• Lying/fibbing: changing the truth to avoid feeling/risking being caught out.

• Comparing: making comparisons to others whom you belief are more successful/better than yourself.

•  Over-preparing: going above and beyond a brief or requirement to feel validated.

• Sabotaging: choosing to sabotage something due to your growing fear, that to see it through would lead to failure.

• Perfectionism – feeling like everything you do is never enough or working above and beyond the requirements to achieve a personal expectation. Shame and embarrassment – scrutinisng the way you have said or done something and filling yourself with regret.

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Whilst these strategies might be working, they are also part and parcel of your problem and why you find yourself looking for coaching, as a means to make a change!

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I.S can also impact your mental health and well-being such as increasing anxiety ( and possibly even panic attacks)  or low mood. Some people also face burn-out where body and mind are exhausted and over-whelmed.   of course this negatively impacts you when you have to do certain tasks, activities or responsibilities like speak in front of others,  finish a project or join a group/socialise.

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Over time this intensifies your self-doubt, can knock your inner-confidence and leave you feeling unsure, insecure and even paranoid.

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People who associate with the term I.S often identify with a difficultly to receive praise. Fearing that it is not genuine feedback, the praise-giver is “just being kind” or making you feel you have to work even harder to achieve future valuation.   

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You spend your time comparing your own ability to others and feeling inferior in skill set or achievements.

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You will often experience shame and embarrassment scrutinising the way you have said or done something and feeling regret for your actions. This can lead to over-thinking.

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Believing the thoughts you have about yourself when you experience IS, can lead to low mood, depression and be demotivating. Sapping the joy out of elements of your life.

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To cope with all the emotions, you feel and the negative self-talk you might have learned some unhelpful coping strategies such as unhealthy habits, self-medicate with drink, drugs or prescription medication or find you have become destructive in your relationships with others.

Imposter Syndrome can be a lonely place that can lead the bubbliest personality to withdraw or feel exhausted when socialising with others.  Having to “put on an act”  can be draining on your energy and take the fun and ease out of time spent with others.  

The good news is, you can turn this round and make positive changes in your own life.

Coaching sessions, together, will help you to understand the games that IS plays with your mind. Equipping you with the ways to handle those big (and often unwanted emotions).

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